Lover of My Soul

 Written by Amanda Allums
Why are so many people unsatisfied in this life? During the holiday season, and as we get closer to the end of another year, we can see greed and discontentment creep into so many hearts because the world has shifted our focus off of the birth of our Savior Jesus Christ and His great love for us, and put it onto gifts, food, parties, and worldly things. We have lost our focus and we have allowed the world to dictate our feelings. Christmas is no longer about Jesus, and the New Year is no longer about fasting and giving our first fruits to God. Now, Christmas is about presents and the New Year is about losing weight. So no wonder people are so unsatisfied when we have allowed how we feel to be based on our circumstances and about what we can do and not what Jesus can do. In fact, most people may not even like the answer to the first question that was asked in this blog: why are so many people unsatisfied in this life? 
The simple answer is because they have not truly given their whole heart to God and sold out to Jesus. People search and search for things that will satisfy them whether it be money, sex, drugs, people, things, or even food, and nothing can satisfy them. There are people that jump out of windows or commit suicide because they are unhappy even though they have billions of dollars. There are people that are depressed even though they have millions of followers and friends. There are people that feel so alone, even though they are constantly surrounded by others. Why? Because nothing can satisfy us except the love of Jesus. Many people have talked about this very topic but as I was listening to a worship song in my playlist, God revealed something to me that I had never thought about on this topic of selling out to Jesus. For me it was like an epiphany and I knew it was from God. 
We may have lovers, and yes, I mean physical lovers. We may have things that make us feel good like alcohol and drugs that take us to another place, or give us a newfound energy or quite the opposite, just numbness. We may even pour our lives into our children and live vicariously through them, whether it be through sports, dance, school, or whatever they are into, but even that can’t satisfy us to the level that Jesus can. There is a hole in the heart that everyone talks about that cannot be filled by anything in this world, and it is real because only Jesus can fill it. This may surprise you, but I am not even talking about just salvation because there is so much more after salvation! You can be saved and still be lonely. You can be saved and still long for more. You have to make Jesus the lover of your soul. This is something only the Word of God can give you, and there is something that only a true sold out heart can have. 
So what is it that only God can give you? It is something that you will just have to experience for yourself and what God desires everyone to have, and it is not easily explainable, but I will do my best to try and describe it. It is the point in your relationship with God that everything you see, you know God made, and anything you own, you know God gave it to you. Any gift that you receive comes from above. You see Jesus in your children and you see Jesus in nature and all around you. You are constantly thinking about Him and constantly giving all of your worries and concerns to Him and prayer. 1 Thessalonians 5:16-18 says, “Rejoice always, pray without ceasing, give thanks in all circumstances; for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus for you.”  You even see Jesus in your circumstances no matter if they are good or bad because you know He is in control of all of it no matter the outcome. There’s no such thing as coincidences anymore because you know that He is the author and finisher of your faith. 
“And may you have the power to understand, as all God’s people should, how wide, how long, how high, and how deep His love is. May you experience the love of Christ, though it is too great to understand fully. Then you will be made complete with all the fullness of life and power that comes from God” (Ephesians 3:18-19).
That is the depth of love that I’m talking about that only Jesus can fill, and nothing will satisfy you until you get to that point.  So how do you get to that point? By truly selling out! You cannot rely on this world, family, friends, or even church alone because any of that can be taken away at any point. Your outlook on life has to be seen through spiritual eyes and the only way that can be done is through prayer and studying your Word, and knowing what it says so that when things happen, you don’t question it, worry about it, stress over it, or have anxiety about it. I have a personal tactic on how I allow God to help me see things in life, however, it is not easily explainable because it comes from God, but I would like to share it in case it may help someone reading this blog. 
How do we allow ourselves to see things through spiritual eyes and allow God to be the cause, the reason, and the answer to everything in life?
Short answer:step back and forget everything you have been taught. Forget everything that you have allowed to influence you. Forget everything that this world has taught you and made you think is right or wrong. Sometimes we even need to forget what our parents taught us or what our church taught us growing up. Step back and forget it all. So what do we start with once we leave it all? We take what we know to be real-God. We pick up our Bible and we read, we pray, and we rebuild our foundation of beliefs from the ground up. Allow God to penetrate our brains and our hearts and shape our mind to see things from His Word and either remember or realize how much He loves us. “Such love has no fear, because perfect love expels all fear. If we are afraid, it is for fear of punishment, and this shows that we have not fully experienced His perfect love” (1 John 4:18). 
In 2009 I read my Bible all the way through for the first time in one year and it essentially hit the reset button on my mind and it was like my mind was open for the first time in my life. I saw things through the eyes of God; I was so self aware that I had to retrain myself how to behave and how to deal with people and situations because I was conflicted and it would be very easy to get anxiety or angry over the injustice in this world. But at the same time, God began giving me fresh vision and dreams and prophecies and was using me because He knew that I was no longer clouded by my childhood, my past hurts, or even my own decisions anymore. I was re-wired and God had made me a new vessel who could be used by God in a new capacity. With that said, God has used me and I am a changed person keenly aware of my surroundings and almost too much at times. But I still feel as if there is so much more for me to do and for God to use me in that it’s just not time yet. 
If you have ever felt like there is so much more for you to do in this life, or you feel like you are not being used to your full potential, then you are on the right track! The fact that you can feel God and desire more is a blessing in itself. We all have seasons in our life and some of those seasons are waiting seasons. Some of them are seasons of lessons or growing pains. The difference is that now we can see them for what they are and not fall into a state of depression or feeling like we are by ourselves and no one cares. Don’t allow the devil to creep in and make you believe those things because God is in control of it all no matter what; and we know that He will work all things for our good (Romans 8:28) because He loves us. We have to be willing to lose it all in order to gain it all. Why was David able to become king after all his family put him through? He knew God loved him and he loved God. Why was Paul able to write so much of the Bible while imprisoned? Because he loved God and knew God was in control. And our answer is the same–when we remember how much God actually loves us and know God is in control, then we can remain at peace and allow His love to still shine through us despite our circumstances. Allow Him to be the lover of your soul and His love will conquer anything and everything it needs to.

Posted in , , ,
Tagged with


Kristy Jennings - December 26th, 2022 at 10:20am

Thank you Pastor Amanda.

John Keytack - December 26th, 2022 at 7:08pm

I had read this earlier today, and just went back to it again. This was a blessing. I especially enjoy the coversational writing stule of Sister Allums. It's not as if she were preaching, or's as though she were sitting at a table with a friend, explaining something.